To live mindfully is to live in the moment reawakening onself to the present rather than rehashing the past or imagining the future. Mindfulness practices have reached an all-time high in popularity.  Every magazine store carries a plethora of volumes suggesting methods and uses of these powerful mental health and spiritual practices.  We meditate, we pray, we breathe.  We go inside and work on ourselves to explore and tame.  It is free, useful, and available without a scheduled appointment.  However, this inward journey can spiritually bypass the “worldfulness” that also requires examination.  What is our exchange with that which is present? How are we doing?  Originating as a practice from Japan, Naikan Mindfulness Practices provide a different door, a view through a unique window.  In this tradition, applying it to the holiday season, we would answer the following three questions:

What do I receive from the holidays? 

No, the question is not “what do I get?’  Taking it out of the realm of physical gifts we go to a more ethereal place.  The answers, often cloaked in gratitude, may include an experience of beauty, more times for connection with friends and family, traditions, special foods.  The list is unlimited and very individual to each of us.

What do the holidays receive from us?

This second question captures our efforts of grace towards others and, perhaps, the environment.  Do we support our favorite charity?  Do we prepare a meal for those we love?  Or go the extra step with those less fortunate?  Perhaps we move a little slower so we can capture those loving moments and give life to them with extra awareness.

What do I do to make the holidays more difficult?

Answering this third Naiken question is a bit more challenging.  We have to look at our impact on the world and the other.  Do I demand more?  Do I over control, be negative, or complain more?  Do I ignore the needs of others or forget to say please and thank you?  Where is the expression of my gratitude?

In the Niakan analysis there is no fourth question.  The world making my life more difficult is given no thought and thusly, no power.  That is about someone else’s Karma, I can only be in charge of my own.  And what a killer of thankfulness and joy dwelling on that possibility can be as we rack up a list of self-defined victimizations.

The practice of Naiken is very powerful and lacks the self-absorption that can result from some practices.  It can be used on any relationship, human or otherwise in our life.  What have I received from my spouse, my friend, my life.  What have they received from me? What do I do to make their experience more difficult?

In the meantime have a warm, loving and transforming holiday season.  January 2nd will arrive and life will fo back to normal.

For further information about Niakan practices go to:

https://www.todoinstitute.org/naikan.html

— Dr. Susan Bettis, Director of Training & Clinical Services